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 Judo icefield (needs approval)

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moonstruck

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Posts : 9
Joined : 2009-05-08
Age : 29

PostSubject: Judo icefield (needs approval)   Tue May 19, 2009 3:28 am

Basic Character Information:
Name: judo Icefield
Age:13
Gender:male
Clan:Diasuki
stats:
chakra 450

Looks:Judo's hair is black with white streaks at the temples. His eyes are light blue with an icy glaze over them. He is white with a seal on his upper right arm. 4 foot tall 40 lb. With the clan seal on his left forearm and his Dia seal on his right shoulder blade. He has absolutely no muscle mass and looks like a pile of skin and bones.

Personality: Judo is shy and afraid of large groups of people that confuse and overpower his sixth sense with too much information. He is fearful of his new home turning on him just as his other one did. He spent all his time studding therefor has trouble relating to other people, but means well and wants to help people. he is slow to anger but becomes unpredictable once aggravated. he enjoys quiet moments with a cup of hot chocolate and good books. And for some odd reason will only refer to ice as bufu.

Jack on the other hand is protective of Judo but also likes other people. he tries to mask his desire to help people by demanding payment in fish. he is close to Judo and often talks to Judo threw a physic link formed from the bonding and helps judo control his chakra.


Kekkei Gekkei:sphere of knowledge
Chakra Cost:quarter = 5, half = 10 full = 15 per post
Description:I Am aware of all physical things in the sphere
Special Effect:this allows me to know the cellular makeup of everyone around me and to keep track of heart rate, blood pressure, brain waves, chemical compounds and the medical status of all people and things within the sphere. The sphere is certainly at 1 foot max
Link: http://narutor.forummotion.com/approved-clans-f140/diasuki-t1846.htm

Skill and Rank Information
Village:Konoha
Rank: Genin

Special Characteristics: i have a penguin spirit sealed in me giving me the sphere of knowledge and my Chakra arms. I also have a dia seal on my right shoulder that reattaches/regrows limbs
Special Effects: my dia seal allows me to reattach or regrow limbs at the cost of 60 chakra and 100 to regrow with all my seals. Jack helps with chakra manipulation, reducing the costs of jutsus by -5, and can provide 100 extra chakra if Jack takes over my body to save me.

Elements: Fuuton and Suiton. (wind and water)
Skills Specialties:truly phenomenal Chakra control, Use of the one power, and a a talent for ice jutsus. primary= Ninjutsu secondary= genjustu


Justus

Name: Transformation Technique
Rank: E
Chakra cost: 5
Type: Ninjutsu
Element: N/A
Description: Henge no Jutsu is a ninjutsu technique which every ninja learns at the Ninja Academy. Henge allows the ninja to transform themselves into any person or object. This allows the ninja to move with stealth or to trick their opponents


Name: bufu skim (ice skim)
Rank: tiered C-S
Type: Ninjutsu
Chakra Cost: C rank = 55 every 3 posts
Element: water (ice)
Description: A layer of ice is created in front of the user who slides along it. Some times ice spikes or ice blades will protrude from the sides. the slider propels himself on a toboggan like layer of chakra



Name: Bufu (ice)
Rank: tiered D
Type: Ninjutsu
Chakra Cost:15
Element: water (ice)
Description: The jujitsu to create and manipulate ice on a small scale and at regular ice temperatures (0C to -10C)

Name: arms of chakra
Rank: tiered C-S
Type: Ninjutsu
Chakra Cost:low to high depending on the roll (3d10-skill)X number of arms
Element: none
Description: arms of chakra are created within my sphere of knowledge giving the area around me the name my \"sphere of influence\" these arms can act as invisible hands that can make hand seals and grab objects.
(note: think of them like vectors from elfin lied and i honestly thought of this character before i saw that anime)

History and RP Sample
History: The day the old healer of the the village of Mononoke died Judo was born and chosen to be the village healer and as such was fused with the penguin demon Jack, an ice demon of healing, who accepted the the villages request in exchange for a steady supply of fish.

Judo spent most of his early childhood working on his Chakra control and learning about the human body. He found companionship with Jack who gave Judo the ability to work with ice and helped him control his Chakra His studies where intense and unending for years, he was the only hope for the village to have a healer.

That hope was smashed weeks before Judo''s 13th birthday as what seemed to be a illness destroyed Judo''s muscles leaving him as a pile of skin and bones. At this time the sphere of knowledge developed and along with it the Chakra arms started to develop. As the village elders looked for a cure it was discovered that the cause was judo doing this to himself with the one power. It was decided that it was best to kill him before he went mad from the taint.



As the elders enter my room i am unable to look up from the bed I have spent the last week and a half in. My body is unmoving and in pain as it takes all my strength just to breath. somethings not right Judo, I can feel it. one of the elders sits next to my bed and breaths deeply “we know how this hapind, we know you can use the one power.”
Just like a boy I herd of in konoha. you can learn from him Judo and perhaps he can fix your body The man continued “We also know that all men who wield the one power go mad and must be killed before they destroy the village and maybe the world.”
Judo... I may need to take control of your body to... one of the men produces a Kama. “no, I will not allow you to kill us” A voice not belonging to Judo comes from his mouth as Judo's body rises out of the bed and levitates a few inches above it. The demon is using his mastery of Chakra to lift himself and keep his body together. “bufu skim” A flash of ice shoots out the door and in the direction of Konaha.

Konaha front gate:
i can feel my chakra running low as My bufu skim brings me within sight of the front gates of Konaha. Jack is in control of my body and seems to be doing something with my chakra that gives my body the semblance of some thin muscle. three days have passed seance I ran away from home, I have only slept twice and woke up with sharp pains in my right shoulder blade. Jack tells me that he has given me a seal that will help me reattach and regrow limbs. he tells me that i will need it because forming muscles can rip them off if you loose your concentration or if you don't form them properly.
OK I'm giving you back control of your body. remember if you loose a limb from the chakra muscles you can just concentrate on the seal on your right shoulder blade and it will ether grow a new limb or reaches it if its close.
I concentrate on my the chakra formed in my legs (giving it too much power) as I land. i take my first step in a weak and my leg flies off in a shower off blood. pain flares up and I cry out in pain as i fall to the ground.


Last edited by moonstruck on Tue Jun 02, 2009 1:45 am; edited 12 times in total
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Minoto
Genin
Genin
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Posts : 1050
Joined : 2008-09-17
Age : 22
Location : Somewhere on the Central Coast

Ninja Profile
Chakra:
200/200  (200/200)
Village: Konoha
Primary Element: Fire

PostSubject: Re: Judo icefield (needs approval)   Wed May 20, 2009 1:40 am

OK!

More on Looks
More on Personality
More on Description in Clan Description
Demons = No, Koro would be a form of Bijuu which is a huge No.
Chakra Arms are a possibility, I am willing to give you a chance
More on ALL Jutsu Descriptions.
More on History
A bit more on RP Sample
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moonstruck

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Posts : 9
Joined : 2009-05-08
Age : 29

PostSubject: Re: Judo icefield (needs approval)   Thu May 21, 2009 12:03 am

updated

my looks and personality are simple because i plan on developing them in RP

my clan was in the approved section

my demon Jack (previously Koro) is to help explan the sphere of knowledge, my ability with chakra, ice element, and for comic relief. he's not as strong as a bijuu (hes only in his early hundreds)

Jutsus are updated and revised

how much history can a 13 year old who spent his life studying have?

also my RP sample is part of my background
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moonstruck

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Posts : 9
Joined : 2009-05-08
Age : 29

PostSubject: Re: Judo icefield (needs approval)   Wed May 27, 2009 11:53 pm

bump
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~Draconis~
S Rank Missing Nin
S Rank Missing Nin
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Posts : 89
Joined : 2009-03-01

PostSubject: Re: Judo icefield (needs approval)   Fri May 29, 2009 12:04 am

well i was asked to review this by mitsu and i see nothing wrong with it and yes he has permission to use the Diasuki clan. Pandos is my other char.
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Rhea

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Posts : 111
Joined : 2008-09-22
Age : 25
Location : .::The Heart of it All::.

Ninja Profile
Chakra:
950/950  (950/950)
Village: Konohagakure no Sato
Primary Element: Fire

PostSubject: Re: Judo icefield (needs approval)   Fri May 29, 2009 12:52 am

- Everything needs a set chakra cost, no ranges please.

- I know you have stated that you haven't mastered the S rank tech yet, but you can't have them in your application until you have RPed to get them. We have a system where you train for a certain amount of posts or words for the tech, then you report it in the Jutsu Creation section, following the guidelines to be approved of and added to your application then.

- For specialties, we ask for the types of techniques you specialize in. Such as Ninjutsu, Taijutsu, Fuuinjutsu, Kenjutsu, etc. I can see that you specialize in Ninjutsu by the tech you have, but the second specialty is up to you.

- Give a detailed explanation on what exactly your Ice/Penguin Demon does, how you got it, and what special effects it grants you as a shinobi. I can see that you have said he reduces the costs of your jutsu, but you need to specify by how much, for example -5. Also, it says he gives you an additional +100 chakra. I suppose that is fine, but you need to explain why.

- As a graduation Academy Student, and now Genin of the village, I suggest you have all the academy jutsu needed to graduate. Not only for story purposes, but for the fact that they are basic techniques that will likely come in handy in the future, plus you have the room to add them limit wise.

- Other than those small issues, I see no major problems with this application.
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moonstruck

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Age : 29

PostSubject: Re: Judo icefield (needs approval)   Tue Jun 02, 2009 1:46 am

revised
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Eris
Jounin
Jounin
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Posts : 27
Joined : 2009-05-03
Age : 25

Ninja Profile
Chakra:
1150/1150  (1150/1150)
Village: Konohagakure no Sato
Primary Element: Wind

PostSubject: Re: Judo icefield (needs approval)   Tue Jun 02, 2009 1:54 pm

Alright, I guess this is approvable now. ^^
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